Podcast

My podcast, Adventures With My Forties, is available on iTunes and your favorite podcast app. Links to each episode’s show notes are listed below. (Warning: it sometimes takes me a day or two or three to get the show notes published.)

My first podcast, Adventures With Postpartum Depression, is still available on iTunes, Stitcher and basically anywhere that you like to listen to podcasts. Unfortunately the website for that site crashed and I lost the show notes. (I am sure this is user error on my part, but it’s fun to blame the internet.) I recorded a few episodes in 2020, but that show is otherwise retired.

Show Notes For Adventures With My Forties

  1. Episode 1, Introduction and Welcome. Welcome aboard! Your seat cushion – oh wait, this is a podcast, not an airplane. I think you can figure out what I talked about on this episode. It’s super quick. And totally skippable. Yes, I really just did write that about my own podcast.
  2. Episode 2, Anxiety During the Pandemic. I started a podcast in July 2020. Of course I talked about anxiety during the pandemic! I took Zoloft for several years after the birth of my children because I had pretty severe postpartum depression. I weaned off Zoloft a couple of years ago. For the first few months of the pandemic, I felt like I had a handle on my anxiety and then BOOM, shit hit the fan, and I went back on Zoloft. I am very grateful that Zoloft is a tool in my mental health kit.
  3. Episode 3, Welcome to Perimenopause? I recorded this episode on Day 41 of my menstrual cycle. What the frick? I have had irregular cycles since I got my first period way back in the sixth grade, but forty-one days? This is beyond irregular for even me. Am I started perimenopause at the age of forty-one? My mom missed her period for NINE MONTHS when she was forty-one, so wow, is that what I am going to experience? Or is this just pandemic stress manifesting in a late period?
  4. Episode 4, Distance Learning and Mental Health. Oh my goodness, distance learnings SUCKS. Here in Pasadena, California, we are starting the school year with more distance learning. I am trying to keep an open mind to the experience. Our school district insists it will be better this time around. It sure as hell cannot be any worse! But as we go forward, my main priority is mental health for both me and my kids.
  5. Episode 5, Neglect the Housework. I talk about one of my favorite books, If You Want to Write by Brenda Ueland and how it has inspired me to make my creative life a priority over having a perfect home. I figure I can have immaculate floors or a podcast. Guess which one I chose?
  6. Episode 6, When Guilt is Bullsh*t. This is the follow-up on Episode 5. Yes, I do advocate neglecting the housework but damn, sometimes that is a tall order. As a woman, I feel so much guilt when I put my needs before others. But you know what? The guilt I often feel as a mom and woman is Bullsh*t.
  7. Episode 7, Embracing Radiant Health. A few years ago, I switched from seeing a traditional “Western” primary care physician to a naturopath. I describe the switch and how my naturopath has empowered me to live a healthier life.
  8. Episode 8, Reconnecting With My Intuition. Intuition is that feeling I have when I know something to be true, but I cannot explain why. It is my deep inner wisdom and connection to the divine. For most of my life, I ignored my intuition. But after I had postpartum depression, I started to reclaim my connection with my inner wisdom. In this episode, I talk about why I lost my connection with my intuition and how I got it back.
  9. Episode 9, Pandemics Suck. I know, I know, I am stating the obvious here. But sometimes, the obvious needs to be stated. Recording this episode was really empowering for me. I needed to take a moment and recognize just how tough 2020 has been.
  10. Episode 10, Pandemic Parenting Jedi Mind Tricks, Part 1. Under the best of circumstances, parenting is tough. Add in a pandemic and some distance learning? Holy sh*t. At the beginning of the pandemic, I wished there was a “Guide to Parenting During A Historic Pandemic” that would help me navigate these stormy times. But the more I reflect on it, the more I realize that the parenting principles that helped me stay sane pre-pandemic also help me stay sane in 2020. In this episode, which is Part 1 of 2, I dive into the principles that are guiding my adventures with pandemic parenting. 
  11. Episode 11, Pandemic Parenting Jedi Mind Tricks, Part 2. It’s just like Episode 10, except the tricks are new!
  12. Episode 12, The Dangerous Self-Care Myth. I love self-care. I believe it is necessary and vital to our lives. BUT: I also believe that self-care gets presented to women as the panacea to all their problems. Feeling down? Buy a scented candle. Feeling unfulfilled and dissatisfied with your life? Take a bubble bath! But as awesome as self-care is, it’s not a substitute for following your inner divine call. If you are feeling miserable because your authentic self has been crushed by society, then it is going to take more than a mani-pedi to feel like your true radiant self. I think the idea that a little pampering is enough to make a woman feel good is a dangerous myth because it ignores the fact that so many of us are living in ways that seem to shred our very souls. 
  13. Episode 13, Bumbling My Way Toward Better Boundaries. Spoiler alert: I am not an expert in having boundaries! Instead, I am an expert in not having healthy boundaries. But I am working at this and making excellent progress. I know that if I keep bumbling, I’ll eventually be a Jedi master at healthy boundaries.
  14. Episode 14, Reclaiming My Voice (Haters Gonna Hate). When I was about eighteen and nineteen years old, I had a few experiences that made me feel like my voice, in both speaking and writing, was not good enough. There was the high school frenemy who told me that I was not funny. Then there was the college “friend” who criticized my potty mouth. And lastly, a creative writing professor basically convinced me that my writing was not any good. I took these experiences to heart and abandoned my personal voice in favor of a voice that I thought people would like more. But now, I am 41 and I can’t muzzle myself anymore. I have been reclaiming my voice lately and damn, I feel good! I feel so much more like myself. In this episode, I talk about the moments that affected my personal voice and the ways I have been reclaiming my voice in recent years.  
  15. Episode 15, Catholic School Detox. I went to Catholic school for 11.5 years, from about halfway through first grade until the day I graduated from high school in 1997. I have not practiced Catholicism since 1997, but I am starting to realize that I internalized a lot of toxic beliefs during my Catholic school years. I am now working to find those beliefs and reject them. I have felt called to do this work for a long time but have avoided it. But I am ready now to face my Catholic school demons.
  16. Episode 16, Distance Learning Suuuucks Soooo Muuuuuch. I revisit the topic of distance learning because hello, it’s 2020 and starting to feel like my second grader will never go back to “normal” school. I was in a 2020 rut at the beginning of October and feeling broken by distance learning. It is so time consuming! And aggravating! But then, my muse gave me an idea: I needed to stop working on my fantasy series and work on a new book called The Distance Learning Activity Book For Parents Just Barely Holding On To Their Last Shred Of Sanity. Writing and publishing that book restored my spirits – but damn, distance learning is still tough. Hence, this episode, in which I share about my struggles and the things that are helping me from completely losing my mind.
  17. Episode 17, A Very Pandemic Holiday Season. It’s 2020. There’s a pandemic. But still, there are holidays to be had. My thoughts and feelings on the 2020 holiday season.
  18. Episode 18, Putting the SELF in Self-Help. I love self-help books! But that has not always been the case. When I was younger, I felt drawn to the self-help section at the bookstore but ashamed at the idea of reading those books. After I I got my first Kindle, I started to make up for lost time. I have learned to be an active participant in the self help books I read, embracing only the ideas that work for me. But the past few years, I took Marie Kondo’s books about decluttering a bit too seriously. I internalized some subconscious belief that if I did not declutter in exactly the way prescribed by Kondo, then I shouldn’t bother doing it at all. Oops! I recently realized that though I find Kondo’s work to be inspiring, I do not have to follow all of her advice. I have started decluttering again in the way that works for me and hallelujah, I have remembered to put the SELF back into self-help. 
  19. Episode 19, Looking Back At 2020 & Ahead To 2019. Happy Almost New Year! At the end of the year, I like to look back at the year I have had and reflect on the work I did to become a better version of myself. I thought that 2020 was going to be a total dumpster fire but after thinking back on the year, was pleasantly surprised to see how much I have grown as a person over the last twelve months. I would never have chosen a pandemic or distance learning for 2020, but that’s what happened, and those experiences pushed me through some incredible growth. I have a lot less mom guilt and better boundaries with my kids. I learned to embrace a slower life, connect more deeply with the people I was able to see, and got really intimate with uncertainty and change. Looking ahead to 2021, I want to build more MOMENTUM. I also want to have more fun. And while having fun, I want to live intentionally and consciously in line with my values. I can’t control the trajectory of 2021 but I have created some projects that will hopefully help me live more joyfully than ever. Au revoir, 2020! Salut, 2021! 
  20. Episode 20, The Space Between Hope and Despair. I got a little philosophical for this episode. Over the past couple months of pandemic and distance learning life, I have noticed that I am my best self when I occupy the space between hope and despair. Hope and despair are mindsets that look to the future. Hope might seem more optimistic than despair, but it conditions future happiness on wanted outcomes. It sets me up for disappointment and discontent. With both mindsets, I feel unsettled and torn from the present. I feel as if my life is somehow lacking. When I occupy the space between hope and despair, I have everything I need to be happy. I am enough. I have enough. I do not set any conditions on my happiness because I am already there. 
  21. Episode 21, My Feelings Have Messages I Want To Heed. I am a feelings amateur but in this episode, I talk about feelings, from my history of suppressing my feelings to my current work to use my feelings as a tool to figure out my subconscious beliefs. We live in a culture that does not value feelings, but I believe feelings are important. Feelings are vital to our work to become our best selves. I felt awkward and completely out of my comfort zone with this episode, but I am excited to do this work. 
  22. Episode 22, Identifying My Core Values. I used to have a LONG list of values, but thanks to Brene Brown, I whittled my list down to two core values: being adventurous and authentic. This was a very empowering exercise. What are your core values?
  23. Episode 23, Building New, Radiant Beliefs. My feelings have helped me identify some toxic, outdated beliefs. Now I am working to replace those beliefs with new, radiant ones. In this episode, I describe the things I am doing to build these new beliefs. Spoiler alert: I am embracing the shit out of affirmations! 
  24. Episode 24, Pandemic Philosophy. The thoughts helping me stay sane (sort of!) as my daughter enters the hybrid hellscape.
  25. Episode 25, The Mirrors That Reflect Our Inner Work. Art, dreams, other people, signs – if I pay attention, these things help me understand the inner work I need to do.
  26. Episode 26, Maternal Mental Health Is A Journey, Not A Destination. Maternal mental health is a cause near and dear to my heart. When I talk and write about maternal mental health, I end up focusing on postpartum depression. That’s an important subject that needs attention, but maternal mental health does not end with the postpartum period. We deserve excellent mental health our entire lives, not just when we have a little baby at home. 
  27. Episode 27, What Does Pandemic Healing Look Like? Holy eff, I don’t know about you, but I am burned out from the pandemic. I feel a deep need to heal from this collective — and personal — traumatic experience. Now that school is out and my kids are both going to camp, I am thinking about what I want to do this summer to heal. 
  28. Episode 28, Kicking Ass and Healing During the 2021-22 School Year. The calendar year might begin on January 1, but the first day of school is the true beginning of the year. My kids returned to school yesterday on August 12, 2021 — it was Julian’s first day of kindergarten, Pippa’s first day of third grade, their first day attending the same school ever, and the first day of “normal” school since March 2020. Whew!
  29. Episode 29: How To Raise A Successful Adult. All the ways I was inspired by Julie Lythcott-Haims’ book How to Raise An Adult: Break Free of The Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid For Success.
  30. Episode 30, Twenty-projects in 2022. I love projects, so these are the ones I am tackling in 2022 to keep my momentum strong. Will I complete all of them? Hell, no! But that’s my process and it is fun to see what sticks and what gets abandonded.
  31. Episode 31, Operation: Reclaim My Life. To deepen my self-work, my word of the year is “reclaim” and I am focusing on four areas: Reclaim My House; Reclaim My Body; Reclaim My Inner Child; and Reclaim My Stories.
  32. Episode 32, Grief Sucks, But I Am Getting Better At Accepting Its Embrace. Musings and ramblings in the wake of my Uncle Pete’s and Grandma Shirley’s deaths.
  33. Episode 33, Your Kids Are Entitled To Your Mistakes. The kids were sassy and rude on Father’s Day, and I exploded and lost all my shits. But then I apologized, and it was a good opportunity to teach by example. If I don’t let my kids see me make mistakes, then they’ll think I’m perfect and that creates unhealthy perfectionism.
  34. Episode 34, Setting My Intentions For the 2023-24 School Year. In this episode, I catch you up on the past year of my life. Long story short: I volunteered for too many things, and then my dad had some serious health issues. This led to some epic burnout, so my intentions for the upcoming school year are to (a) volunteer way less and (b) take the time to heal. 
  35. Episode 35: When You Get Sucked Into Other Folks’ Agendas. . I talk about ways I got hijacked by other folks’ agendas into doing volunteer work that doesn’t actually align with my values and beliefs. Specifically, I’m looking at AYSO, Girl Scout cookies and the frenzied hell that is cookie season, and the PTA membership drive. 
  36. Episode 36: The Path to Enlightenment Is In The Elementary School Car Line. Every school day, when I drop my kids off, someone in the car line is a jerk or idiot or both. This used to rile me up and I’d feel outraged at the injustices of car line. But recently I realized: what if the path to enlightenment is in car line? What if I can stay serene no matter what the other parents do while dropping kids off at school?
  37. Episode 37: Rebuilding My Mind-Body Connection. I talk about my mind-body connection, or lack thereof, and how hot yoga and the enneagram are helping me rebuild my relationship with my body. 
  38. Episode 38: It’s Fall Y’All. I talk about welcoming the new season, my 2023 Fall Bucket List and my Fall JOMO List (all the things I will NOT be doing this fall).
  39. Episode 39: Why Do Women Love True Crime? I listen to true crime podcasts and often wonder, Why do I love consuming to these stories? And perhaps, more importantly: does my interest in true crime suggest some sort of moral deficiency on my part? Spoiler alert: I think my interest in true crime comes from a place of empathy and empowerment.
  40. Episode 40: Bitches Love Witches. People tend to think of witches as evil but I love stories that reclaim witches and allow them to be good, strong and powerful. Why must a woman who practices magic be considered evil? Is the idea of the evil witch in the woods just another tool for controlling women, keeping them in line and fitting into the patriarchy’s mold? Let’s save the witches from patriarchal stereotypes because bitches love witches.
  41. Episode 41: Introducing Project 24 in ’24. I don’t do resolutions. I do projects.
  42. Episode 42: The Dark Side of Girl Scout Cookies. Yes, I went there.