A post from four years ago showed up in my Facebook Memories today. It still relevant and necessary, so I’m sharing it here:

Can I rant? Because I need to rant and I refuse to be the complacent, meek, well-mannered lady that some idiots expect me to be. Because when I feel violated, even if the violation seems small, I will still roar. I can be sweet and loving and compassionate and still fierce and strong and brave.

here’s what happened: after Zumba today at my gym, while I was naked and wet in the shower, a female janitor who spoke very little English told us that men were coming into the locker room. That was it, no more info.

Apparently the men — there were three of them — averted their eyes and did not look, nevermind the fact that there are mirrors everywhere. Apparently the manager – a man – asked some women who were fully clothed if it was okay for them to come in, and those women said yes. so why bother asking the naked women in the showers – there were many of us – if it’s okay to send three men into the locker room? Apparently they only went to check on the toilets. But hey, the toilets are in between the showers and the lockers, where our clean clothes were waiting. Apparently they just needed a few minutes, but no one told us how long it would be. how long we had to wait naked in the showers. apparently they hung a sign ten minutes before they went into the locker room — but I’m not an idiot, I can tell time, I know I entered the locker at 9:35 and the men were there before 9:45. That’s not ten minutes!

Was it rape? Was it assault? of course not. but it’s all the small little violations that make it easier for men to do the horrible things that still happen every day, every hour, every minute, to women all over the world.

And so what am I supposed to do? Join a less convenient gym? Or go back to this gym, in fear it will happen again? NO. I called corporate headquarters and I’m following up, and if this happens again, then I’ll decide what I’m doing next. because I should not feel scared away from the gym I love because a male manager does not get it. Does not get that this is my body, it is sacred, it is beautiful and I’m not rolling over and playing dead just because this is the way he has been inspecting lockers for years and no one has complained. i’m not taking his word on this. and even if no one has complained, that does not mean it is right.

Part of me is scared and, having complained to the manager, wants to avoid this gym because he won’t like me now. But you know what? I’m done with staying silent about little violations just to make sure some man in charge of my gym like me. I don’t care if he or anyone else likes me. You don’t get to trample over my right to privacy. And maybe this manager hates me now. Maybe he thinks I’m a pain in the ass because I called corporate hq and made a complaint. That’s fine. Why do I want him to like me anyway? I am braver than that. I will keep going to my gym, my favorite Zumba classes, and I will keep complaining if necessary, and I will roar even if the violation seems small, even if the male manager is ignorant as to what it means to be a woman, because though I may be sweet and loving, I am a fierce bad ass.

I get chills reading this. Go, me! What a bad ass. I feel inspired by Courtney From Four Years Ago to keep standing up for myself and being fierce. ROAR!