Mistakes Were Made: The 2022-2023 School Year Burnout Edition

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The 2022-23 school year kicked my ass. Now that we are deep into summer vacation, I want to look back, reflect, and assess before I get sucked into the next school year.

Here’s a timeline:

  • End of The 2021-22 School Year: I volunteered for all the things. In January 2022, my Uncle Pete died. Two weeks later, my Grandma Shirley died. At the end of February, I ran the school book fair and this experience revived me and pulled me out of my grief. I reasoned, Volunteering is good for my mental health so I should volunteer as much as possible!
  • I volunteered to be the VP of Volunteers for my kids’ PTA; to run the book fair again; to be coaches for both my kids’ soccer teams; and to become a Girl Scout leader for Pippa’s troop.
  • Oops.
  • August 2022: No one volunteered to be the Room Parent Chair, my former PTA role, so I shouldered that responsibility in addition to my new role as VP of Volunteersl. Then I volunteered to be a room parent for Julian’s first grade class and Pippa’s fourth grade class – but thank god, I had co-room parents for both grades. And then, since I’m an idiot, I volunteered to be the art docent for Julian’s class (at our school, docenst prepares extra art projects and lessons).
  • August 2022: I attended two different soccer trainings on two different Saturdays to be an AYSO coach in the smothering heat. Also, I completed tons of online training. I receiveced rosters for my teams and nagged parents to volunteer to be refs and shit.
  • August 2022: I also completed online training to be a Girl Scouts leaderl.
  • August 2022: I remembered how much work I have to do as a PTA board member and room parent at the beginning of the school year and hated myself.
  • September 2022: My dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer.
  • EMOTIONAL OVERLOAD.
  • Brief thoughts on my dad’s prostate cancer: I knew that if he had to get cancer, this was the best case scenario. I knew the likelihood of a good outcome was close to 100%. BUT THIS WAS STILL DEVASTATING AND DRAINING AND I NEEDED TIME TO CHILL OUT AND PROCESS BUT I HAD VOLUNTEERED FOR ALL THE THINGS AND SOLDIERED ON.
  • October 2022: I was coaching two soccer teams, which was draining for me, and I especially hated the logistical side of things. But the thing I hated most about being an AYSO coach was the stupid red shirt I had to wear that made me feel like a porpoise. I was also organizing volunteers for the school carnival, recruiting both youth volunteers and cajoling room parents to recruit their parents to man carnival booths. I was running on fumes, but I did enjoy being a Girl Scout leader.
  • First Sunday of November 2022: School carnival. I was in charge of youth and parent volunteers for all the booths and THIS IS NOT MY WHEELHOUSE. Not even a little. We didn’t have enough parent volunteers, though parents were milling about having a good time, refusing to volunteer, while I was stressed, bitter and miserable. After this ordeal, I felt wrecked for weeks.
  • December 2022: I realized I hate coaching soccer. I’m just not a coach. I loved coaching my kids’ teams ONCE and we will always have those memories but that’s it.
  • December 2022: From the Department of Things Going Right, my dad had surgery and kicked prostate cancer in the ass.
  • January 2023: I realized I was absolutely burnt out but didn’t want to quit mid-school year on my responsibilities. I resolved to finish the year as the PTA’s VP of Volunteers, room parent for both kids classes, book fair chair (which meant running the Scholastic book fair in late February) and art docent. I further resolved to volunteer less in the 2023-24 school year.
  • First Half of February 2023: My dad had emergency brain surgery.
  • Fuuuuuck.
  • My dad spent 10 days in the ICU and had one more brain surgery. I was there almost every day. I realized I didn’t have the capacity to run the school book fair and passed the baton to another mom.
  • I told PTA folks that I would not be rejoining the PTA board for the following school year.
  • March 2023: I resigned from my role of VP of Volunteers because I just didn’t have it in me to even check my PTA inbox.
  • April 2023: My dad had two more brain surgeries which resolve the issue that began in February (ruptured AVM, long story). He begans the road to recovery. Spoiler alert: he’s doing great.
  • May 2023: I dragged myself through the end of the school year, attending talent shows and spring instrumental concerts, and organized class parties for first and fourth grade.
  • June 1, 2023: The 2022-23 school year concludes. I was the human equivalent of a pile of ashes.

But sometimes, you need to be burnt into a pile of ashes to release your inner phoenix…

I shall continue this adventure tomorrow!