Yesterday was a rough day. It was Day 26 of Social Distancing (one of my friends is keeping track on Instagram so when I lose track of time, that’s the first place I check!) and I felt empty.

I tried to carry on with the day and gave Pippa the manicure she has been requesting for weeks. That went well and was quite enjoyable. Then I gave Julian a matching manicure. That went well, too. Then Pippa begged to give me a manicure, and I agreed. She knocked over the teal nail polish and I tensed up. She spilled the pink nail polish on the floor and chair and I gritted my teeth. I knew I was on the edge. But I let her continue. (That was … not wise.) As she was applying the top coat, the clear finishing liquid got mixed up with the teal polish —

And I lost my shit.

I apologized and we made up. But I knew I was struggling because I am usually the mom who is fine with messes. Paint on the floor? Wipe it up! Messy clothes? Into the washing machine! Shrugging off messes is like my superpower, but yesterday, wow, it was like I was scheduled to lose my shit. ANYTHING was going to push me over the edge.

After losing my shit over my manicure, I felt prickly and hyper-irritated until the kids went to bed. Then I watched Chopped and Survivor with Nathan while knitting a scarf and slowly, my spirits improved. As I got ready for bed, I reflected on my bad mood and decided that on the morrow, I would keep my expectations really, really low. I recognized that I was feeling empty and drained, so I decided to give myself A Day of Doing As Little As Possible. I would tell the kids that mommy was available for snuggles and reading books and nothing else. I would take the day off from science experiments, baking, and messy art. I might even skip my daily walk so I could spend extra time on the couch reading The UnHoneymooners. With that plan in place, I fell into a very deep and restful sleep.

I slept seven glorious hours and then, after getting up to pee, could not get back to sleep. I lay in bed, half-dozing, half-thinking for nearly two hours, 100% certain that I was going to have a very lazy rainy Thursday. I did not get out of bed until 7:30.

As I emerged from my bedroom, I realized that I had more energy than I had anticipated. Huh. I still decided to have low, low expectations for the day. I snuggled with my kids and read them a book. All was going according to my plan.

But then: I did a little school work with Pippa; went on an hour long walk; went on another walk with the kids and Nathan to hunt down rain puddles; bathed the kids (oh, we found rain puddles!); and baked banana bread with the kids. I even managed to cross off a couple of boring items on my To Do list (register for school’s online auction; order Vitamin B; I told you they were boring).

I kept my expectations as low as possible and that felt good. I am going to try to keep that in mind as we continue through The Great 2020 Adventure. When my expectations are high, I set myself up for failure. But when I give myself permission to spend the day on the couch, then anything beyond that feels like a glorious triumph.

I am officially writing myself a blank check to take as many Do As Little As Humanly Possible days as I need to take in order to thrive during this adventure. I might never need to cash that blank check, but just knowing it’s there gives me some psychological relief.